Ahh, the good old days. Back when syphilis was incurable and warmth was a luxury for the rich, ordinary folks didn't have an easy way to live out their long held fantasies. Today, if you are obsessed with battleships, you can download some app to your phone (World of Warships is supposed to be fantastic) and sink enemy ships at your hearts content. Back in the day, you'd have to weld together 360 lbs of scrap metal, wire up some vacuum tube based remote control, and mount actual .38 caliber guns to the deck. Death was a bit more permanent, even in a game back then, but kids were tougher and if you had cancer you were told to walk it off. Find this 1937 Remote Controlled Battleship offered for $3,750 in Escondido, CA via craiglist.
According to the seller, this USS CALIFORNIA replica was built in the early days of civilian RC modeling. She tips the scales at 0.18 tons and was built by a Howard E. Bixby of Glendale, CA. You can find a PDF scan of a Radio-Craft magazine from the 1940s with Mr Bixby and his fleet here.
If you ever wonder what keeps an ATF agent up at night -- this is it. Totally unregistered and awesome collection of .38 and .22 caliber functioning firearms attached to a remote control boat. Forget about drones taking pictures of you in your underpants, this is a boat that can float around the local duck pond and kill your entire family.
There is probably enough mercury, lead, and arsenic in this remote control module to qualify as a Superfund site. But you should be a man, and walk off that lead poisoning.
See another sea worthy feature worthy of feature? firstname.lastname@example.org