This is just a run of the mill 350 V8 mated to a slushbox El Camino, but the seller includes a few humourous lines in his advertisement, the full non family friendly text is displayed below for posterity.
1977 El Camino (Last year of the Chevelle big body. . .no bondo)
Does it run?: Yes sir!
Miles: 75,000 or 175,000 (not sure. . .runs like it has 75)
Transmission: Automatic 350 Turbo
Carburetor: 2 Barrel
Body: Kind of Rough
Door Locks: No need (People wont steal it)
Title Status: Clean Colorado Title In Hand
Rust?: Yeah, it has some. Makes it lighter and gets better MPG.
Exhaust: Headers with dual Flowmaster pipes
Includes: For the price it comes with all the necessary upholstery to perform a proper restoration. Roof upholstery, carpet, extra drivers side window, dash kit, and the seats are already in mint condition so need to replace those.
Call, email, or text to check it out. . . no tire kickers or ass-hats.
Sort of Important Stats:
If you're suffering from anger, depression, tired of dealing with constant disappointment, angry at Ewoks, started recognizing that you're highly replaceable at work, hungry, thirsty, excited by women wearing tight fitting clothes, upset by attractive women not wearing tight fitting clothes, disgusted with traffic, pissed off at kale and everyone that wants you to eat it, and or disgruntled by pictures of stolen cats. I have the cure for one or more of those symptoms.
The El Camino. When translated from Spanish to English. The literal meaning is "Fucking Radical" or "the journey."
While nobody understands the true meaning of the words, what matters most is that this truck was the first Transformer ever made.
This vehicle is a treat to drive and would make an incredible father and son, mother and daughter, or super cool uncle and nephew restoration project. Don't waste your time or mine offering me $800 or $1000 for this truck. I have nearly that much invested in restoration parts that I'm including with the vehicle.
- Optimus Prime is directly related to the El Camino.
- Did you know that in 1977 the El Camino was the fastest production truck made that year?
- To this date the El Camino is still one of the top five fastest automobiles ever produced. The only vehicles that can outrun this champion are that car that Knight Rider drove and the General Lee.
- Having trouble throwing wood at night? After just one a day of driving this classic you can throw away your towel racks; because your wife, girlfriend, special lady you met at the bar, or all the above. . .. will be making all sorts of diving board and woodchuck comments about your member.
- Hell, if you laid down all your boners that you've ever had and added the distance Payton Manning can throw a football. It still wouldn't touch the distance that this car reaches from front to rear bumper.
- Did you know that in the movie "Roadhouse" Patrick Swazey drove an El Camino in the original version? Problem was nobody would fight him when they saw this car in the parking lot. Badass!
- This car causes hallucinations. Each time you drive another vehicle you'll wish that you were steering an El Camino instead.
- If you get into a front end accident with this car; you'll have about 3-5 seconds before you're at the scene of the crime. It has that much hood in front of it!
- You can't sneak up on shit in this vehicle. Recently I got pulled over in Denver because a police officer heard the vehicle starting and set up a speed trap. . .I was in Castle Rock.
- The El Camino will not only keep the monsters from getting under your bed. . .it will take them out to the shed and go all sorts of 50 shades of gray on their asses.
- When you woke up this morning. . .did your upper lip greet your nose with a moustache kiss? Well lucky day for you. If you can't grow facial hair. . . after two days after driving an El Camino you'll be ready to call in an Amber Alert on yourself.
- It is the only truck Chewbacca will drive.
- The reason people dress up like clowns, become thieving bankers, crooked lawyers, and enjoy Stevia, is because they're not driving one of these. You can't fix the healthcare situation, solve racism, or learn how to play the guitar by purchasing this piece of steel. But nobody will care, because you're sitting in an El Camino.
- Why would you buy an El Camino? Same reason you wouldn't wear a condom, it feels awesome!
- It's the only car approved for transporting sharks safely.
- The last picture is what I was planning on doing to this truck if I kept it. Unfortunately I have too many projects in my garage. Please call or email to schedule a time to check out the El Camino.
Keywords: Muscle Car, Big Block, Fast, Vintage, Original Parts, Classic Car, Restoration Project, Chevy, Ford, Dodge, GMC, PCP, Race Car, Drag Car, Automobile that will make up for my lack of personality, lifted El Camino, Monster Truck, Llama Pornography, Drift, Mexican Bus, Loud Exhaust, White Trash, Soft Taco Ball Gag, Barter, Danger 5
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