Friday, February 27, 2015

10k: Sore-y A-boot That: 1996 Alfa Romeo Spider Tipo 916

It is time for a rescue mission. Someone has to save this next car from the hazards of the wild northern plains of Canadia. Potential ruination lurks behind each igloo -- the moose bites, hail damage, snow storms, old people (because of good/cheap healthcare they live till 100+), hockey pucks, and four-way-stop "go-ahead, no you go-ahead" slow motion crashes.  Find this 1996 Alfa Romeo Spider Tipo 916 offered for $12,999 CAD (I think this is free in USD or 7.2 cents, not sure) via craigslist located somewhere north of Washington State in a "Province" called British Columbia (yeah, as if that is a really place.)  Tip from Gianni.

The Alfa Romeo Spider built from 1995-2006 shares a platform with the Alfa Romeo GTV  from the same era, and was a replacement for the aging Alfa Spider Guilia (1966-1993).  The Pininfarina designed exterior was a huge step forward in looks, but unfortunately the car moved onto a transverse longitudinal front drive set up. 

Power comes from a 2.0 liter 16-valve TwinSpark inline-4 that pushes 150 horsepower and 134 ft-lbs of torque into the front mounted 5-speed transaxle.  60mph is dispatched in 8.5 seconds and the car maxes out around 135mph -- not horrible paper stats, but nothing to write home about in the late 1990s.  

Good luck importing this less than 95 year old "classic" into the USA without bribing some DHS employees, but in 5 years this will be fair game because according to US customs law, it will be safer then.  See another Italian-Canadian?


  1. This car does need saving. It may not hold up as well at moose hunting as this chevy.

  2. I guess you are trying to make a point, eh? Sorry to disappoint you (well, actually, we are sorry about nearly everything, even if we didn't do anything) but I don't think there are ANY plains in British Columbia. Oh, and contrary to what you might think about some place with "British" in its name, B.C. is about (or aboot) the only place in Canuckistan that does NOT leak oil.

    In fact, when I saw the title of this listing (before I read your hurtful comments about our beloved land) (oh, sorry, I didn't mean to type that out loud, just in case it might hurt your feelings) I thought the joke was about (or aboot) the booty that this car presents to the world. Honestly, both a face and a rear end only an Italian mother could love.

    Sorry if that last bit offends Italians or mothers, or even Kardashians, since they seem to have a patent on booties.

    Time to go join the around-the-block line up for some free health care, and hope my name doesn't come up at the Death Squad Health Care Rationing Committee meeting.

    1. I smell manure....COW!

    2. Reminds me of the lead singer in Great Big Sea congratulating a MN crowd on the second place finish of the USA Olympic hockey team. Because it would be un-Canadian to brag.

  3. I'm one of those aged cranks who believes that when one merges the term 'front-wheel drive' with 'Alfa Romeo' the result is not necessarily something worth spending real money on.

    I believe the Fiat/Chrysler/Alfa combine has pretty much come to that conclusion as well.

  4. We are not amoosed. The only reason this is for sale is it does not have the capacity to carry enough dog food for the team required to pull it around in the winter.

  5. You should see my igloo garage! 2 storeys! And the one month a year we have sun is when we get the race cars out!


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